Monday 7 March 2011

A Nice Day Out In Perth

Last Saturday far too early in the morning I boarded the bus to go to Perth to picket the Liberal Democrat Scottish Conference.

Naturally I was wearing my hi-vis jacket (See the suggestions made by the Let's Get Visible page on Facebook ).

The Police were present in huge numbers. In fact they probably out numbered us as there were only about 300 there. Two individuals who berated UNISON NLC Branch members for not attending demos were themselves absent from this. What we lacked in numbers was made up for by enthusiasm.

As well as the trade unionists there was a VERY strong presence of disabled activists who are particularly hacked off at the cuts to their income (which ARE happening despite what George Osborne and Danny Alexander say).

Most of the Lib Dems opted not to come out for lunch that day. The most famous face I saw was Russell Fairgrieve. No minister or other prominent figure appeared. Nick Clegg apparently sneaked in the back door. Good to know that the Deputy Prime Minister of this country is so craven he can't face a couple of hundred people who think he's wrong. We're all in together indeed.

The Lib Dems did offer a private meeting with some of the leading disabled activists. The activists are happy to meet but wish to do so in public. The relevant Ministers didn't seem to like this. Another example of their courage.

There was the usual barracking and most delgates scuttled away quickly, hiding their Conference passes. Most justed stayed in the hall. A brave few stood and smiled at us, but those smiles were wiped away by a quick chant of "Barnsley, Barnsley, Barnsley".

In all a nice day out and much more effective than a huge public demo which will be miles from those we "Lobby",

Five Women

Everything that is good about me was shaped by women. Sure male friends and relations have had their influence, but it's the women who have really counted.

Margaret Meiehofer, my mother. Her example taught me that it is OK to be smart and that education is good for itself alone. She also showed me that caring for others is the one thing we must all do.

Helen "Nen" Meiehofer, my auntie who took me in when my mother died. This despite the fact that she had 10 kids of her own. She taught me the importance of supporting family and friends in hard times. She also showed me that REAL love is expressed in practical terms rather than through hearts and flowers.

Carolyn Forrester, my first wife. She gave me the confidence to return to University to complete my education and a belief in my intellectual abilities.

Chrissie Carmouche, my best friend. She convinced me (by plucking me from obscurity to take her place as Secretary of the largest Trade Union branch in Western Europe) that I could make a positive contribution to public life. I have gone on to be a National Chair in the largest union in the United Kingdom, be Secretary of the Scottish Branch of the Trading Standards Institute and soon to be National Chair of TSI (subject to the democratic process)

Elizabeth Meiehofer, my wife. She got me to believe in myself once more when my ego had taken some hard knocks. Together we have raised our fine son and we have faced redundancy and cancer and beaten them both.

I think if we are honest, most of us owe a lot to the women in our life so on this International Women's Day let us celebrate and give thanks to our mothers, wives, daughters, cousins and friends for the joy and comfort they bring to this world and maybe we blokes should try just a little harder to make their lives easier.

Wednesday 19 January 2011

Who is REALLY to Blame for the Funancial Crisi

Bankers are often blamed for the finaciaql crisis, but in fact the Government has identified the following as being those really to blame

1.The Guardian
2.Islington luvvies
3.Scotland
4.Wales
5.Northern Ireland
6.The Queen Mother (being dead for a number of years hasn't stopped her from being a big drain on the public purse)
7.Asylum seekers
8.Scroungers
9.Old Firm supporters
10.Fans of Man U, Liverpool, Man Ciry, the Arsenal, Chelsea, and most of all Alloa Athletic
11.The Bonzo Dog Doodah Band
12.Bank customers
13.Mark Steele, Billy Connolly, Kevin Bridges, Dara O'Brien and anyone who has ever apperaed on Mock the week, the News Quiz or the Now Show
14.Pete Postlethwaite, Susannah York and gerry rafferty
15.Any Facebook freind of Harold meiehofer
16.Sheep and other farm animals
17.Dogs, cats and other domesticated pets
18.Hospital patients, especially cancer fighters
19.Old people who refuse to die
20.Sick people who refuse to die
21.Young people who refuse to die
22.Commercial fishermen
23.Non-commercial fishermen
24.The Police
25.Fire Brigade
26.The BBC
27.Dr Who
28.My mum (deceased 1970)
29.Inverness Caledonian Thistle
30.Srudents
31.School pupils (but NOT truants)
32.The Broons and Oor wullie
33.Desparate Dan (Do you have any idea how much a cow pie costs these days
34.The Callaghan Government
35.Pope Bendeict
36.The girl on You Tube who fell into a fountain whilst texting
37.Anyone who listens to "The Archers", "get it on with Bryan Burnett" or "Woman's Hour"
38.Anyone who watches Eastenders, Coronation Street, BBC4, Panorama or any rolling news programme (But not Sky or Fox obviously)
39.The BBC
40.Imelda May
41.The Gallagher Brothers
42.Eddie Izzard
43.Motorists, smokers, drinkers and anyone with an annual income of less that £50K who has the audacity to eat food
44.The makers and fans of Shameless, The Wire, the West Wing, The sopranos, Upstairs Downstairs.and How Clean is your House
45.Three men fae Carntyne, a bottle of wine, and five Woodbine, a big black breyhoond dug called Boab, frae up oor close, alang oor street, a lassie called senga who works in the dairy, 's been skelly ever since the Milanda boay hit her on the heid with a briedboard, all of whom went to join the Parish, only to find it was shut (due to the hard decsions made by thsi coalition Government)
46.Malcolm Tucker
47.Graham Norton and Alan Carr (but NOT Johnny Carr)
48.Anyone who has ever appeared on
49.Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Albus Dumbledore, and the entire Weasley family (But NOT Lord Voldemort
50.Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin
51.The Liberal Democratic Party (Oops, sorry Nick)
52.Rupert and Paddington Bears etc etc etc
53.Oh and of course me, for going to the pictures on the odd occssion and preferring Andrex quilted to Izal


This list is not exhaustive and readers are invited to submit their suggestions.



I'm off to end it all and avoid becoming a burden on the state

Monday 10 January 2011

Big H v Big C: Radio Gaga

Well they told me today that I would have to have radio therapy, which is a bit of a bummer.

I hadn't expected this as I had been told that this almost certainly wouldn't be necessary as surgery would almost certainly remove all of the melanoma. What happened was that 9 lymph nodes were removed from my neck and shoulder. Ouch I hear you cry.

Eight of these were intact. The ninth showed signs of "extra capular spread". That is it was burst. My surgeon, the brilliant Tamir Shoaib removed the muscle around the burst node but there is no way to be sure that all the cancerous cells have gone. They probably have but Radio therapy is used as a "belt and braces". I have to be fitted for a mask, which will be used to ensure that only the target area is hit by radiation. Then six weeks of radio therapy. Unfortunately I will not glow in the dark which would have been quite cool.

This is of course a bit of a set back, but I'm not worried. An individual as pig headed and stubborn as me simply will NOT be beat by cancer. So I fight on for another round, but I will get a knock out in the next round I'm sure (Cue theme from "Rocky", bit I'm running up nae B!££$% steps!)

On a lighter note my new hat is absolutely spiffing. So much so that i have taken to wearing it indoors and am morphing into Grandad from "Only Fools and Horses". Thomas seems resigned to being Rodney but I cannot get Elizabeth to respond to "Del Boy".

Hope you all had a great Christmas and New Year and that you join with me in sparing a few moments to think of the friends and familes of those killed in the awful incident in Arizona and indeed all other victims of crime, hatred and tyranny throughout the world

I'll see you on the other side

Harold

Wednesday 5 January 2011

Addicted to Facebook?

I have been an admirer of Ruth Wishart’s writing, but have to say that her latest column on Facebook seemed just a little lazy; it can be difficult to work over the holiday season.

Ms Wishart concedes some of the advantages of Facebook. Certainly it has enabled me to establish contact with many people I haven’t seen for years. Most important has been the fact that I now speak almost daily with a cousin in Australia whom I have not seen since 1973. In addition I have been able to establish a network of contacts across the globe with whom I have a laugh and a joke every day. Also, we exchange views on politics, music, cinema and so on. Frankly I rely more on Facebook friend reviews than on the professionals (Except of course for the marvellous Mark Kermode; oops I forgot, he’s a Facebook friend).

I am currently recovering from an operation. Facebook has allowed me to keep people up to date on my progress without making hundreds of phone calls, emails etc. I was even able to do this from my hospital bed using a mobile phone. My spirits have been greatly lifted by all of the messages of support and encouragement I have received.

Am I addicted to Facebook? Yes probably, but no more than those who spend hours on the phone or down the pub are addicted. I am also addicted to cigarettes and I suspect they are a lot more harmful.

In the end, Facebook is a bit of fun. If it’s not your bag, fair enough, but do not try to impose your choices on me.

Tuesday 4 January 2011

BBC and the Ibrox Disaster

I was astonished to discover that BBC Scotland was not showing live coverage of the Ibrox Disaster memorial service on TV. It appears that the Saints and Scroungers show hosted by Don from the One Show was more important. I discovered later that the service was shown online and also by Sky Sports. Hard lines if you don’t have a computer or Sky subscription.

I turned to the radio and thankfully BBC Radio Scotland was covering the event. One part of the service that I thought would be particularly important, especially for any friends or relatives of victims unable to attend was the reading of the names by John Grieg and Walter Smith. Well tough for the listeners as the commentators spoke over this. The names were read out by two BBC announcers at the end. I suspect this was because the Beeb had received telephone complaints, but I’m sure most people, like me, would have preferred to hear what the people at Ibrox heard.

Then the two minutes silence started. Only, we had to guess because the commentators failed to announce this.

In making these decisions the BBC has demonstrated crass insensitivity and editorial incompetence. Quite simply they misread the mood of a nation.

This is all the more amazing since in the run up to the anniversary BBC coverage of this topic has been excellent. They had a special documentary and nightly reports on Reporting Scotland as well as frequent references on radio news.

Isn’t it bewildering that News International got it right whilst the BBC got it so wrong? I do not have a Sky subscription but do pay a BBC licence fee. They have let me and all other licence payers down.

The BBC owes the Scottish people an apology.